I keep my circle small. I don’t need a bunch of people surrounding me that only like to party and talk shit about others they also claim to be cool with. You can keep that & I prefer it that way. I’m happy with who I have, my music, and some books. I don’t need too damn much. And don’t get me wrong, I’ll respect you and continue to be kind if I cross paths with you but I’m not going to associate myself with you and go out of my way to be around you. And no that doesn’t make a bitch for doing so. You can move along now. You have plenty of people to talk shit about other people with and I’m not one of them. It’s not that hard to understand. (: 

No matter how strong you tend to be, sometimes shit just gets to you. You can’t get certain shit out of your head and it tears you down mentally and physically. If you need to vent, then do so. Never be afraid to express what you’re feeling or thinking just because people may not understand or will judge you for it. You may bend but you have the ability to not let things break and define you. When you realize that you can get through anything. Thing is, I’m aware of this but I can’t shake the feeling of certain things and it’s getting to me. 

I find it funny when certain people that only come around every 5 years or so even when we live less than 2 hours away from each other wants to open their mouth and tell you what to do. Family or not, you have no right to tell me what I should and shouldn’t do because you feel it’s the right thing. Especially when we’re not close. Stop with the bullshit and quit acting like you care.  

I just realized I watch too many Korean, Japanese, & Chinese action movies. No regrets lol.

I just want to have a random shindig so I can cook a bunch of filipino food and invite everyone lol. 

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Can’t tell people they’re wrong for feeling good about themselves. We all have things to work on. Some people already have confidence, others have to work on gaining it. Never did I ever put myself down or feel bad because there was nothing to feel bad about. My childhood was amazing but having little to no confidence and being shy were the main things that held me back on a lot of things growing up. The past two years I’ve gained more confidence and I can’t believe it took this damn long because I’ve been happier than ever once I got over certain things. I’m a work in progress and always will be. You’re never too old to better yourself so keep doing whatever it is you love. Keep growing and learning.

You may not like me for whatever reason and that’s all good. I still have mad love and respect for everyone. I’ve gotten to a point in my life where I’ve learned to let go of everything that was negative. Whether it was people or what they’ve done. I’ve learned to forgive and I’ve actually reached genuine peace in doing so. No, I will never talk or let certain people back in my life but I learned that I don’t need to have hatred or anger. After all, it doesn’t do anything but affect me and my life. It robs you of actually living your life and enjoying it the way we should. I don’t know where I planned on going with this post but all I know is life is good. No, I don’t have everything but I’m alive, i’m not sick, and I have people who truly love and care for me and that’s all I really need to be happy. 

When you’re admiring another girl because she’s really pretty but they think you’re hating or something. Like chilllllll girl! Not every girl hates on other girls who are genuinely beautiful. Some of us just know when we see a pretty person and acknowledge it. Get off your high horse. Lol. 

Today was a great day. Exhausting, but great nonetheless for the most part until I started feeling like crap. But I wasn’t even thinking about myself when you mentioned how hungry you were. And you know when there’s someone you’re happy seeing no matter how tired or crappy you feel? Well this was one of those cases. I was all happy and looking like a dumbass. I went out of my way despite how tired and crappy I felt to get you some food only to arrive at your place and see what I saw. I don’t even know if it’s sadness I’m feeling. Disappointed is the better word.

All I know is that it should not be that hard to let someone know you’re not feeling it or you don’t share the same feelings instead of pretending you do. Don’t front or give an BS excuses. You want to talk to someone else or multiple people, then let someone know so they put a halt right then and there and not develop more feelings so they can walk away not feeling like shit. Have people wasting their time with false shit. 

It’s all good though. At least I know not to waste my time instead of finding out later on when the feelings are too strong. Time to keep on moving & smiling. 

I just realized I’ve only posted a picture once on this damn thing. Lol. Now you know I’m a real person hahaha. Blah, I need to get my mind off things and it’s too late to play the guitar. >.< 

I just hope that whatever it is you love to do in this damn life, you put your all into it and not just go half-assed. Always put in a little more effort than the previous day. I hope that you don’t allow people and their negative ways to control your days and how you perceive yourself. Above all, I just hope you’re happy. 

You have seriously got to be one fucked up person full of hatred to bash on people that are battling certain things that they were born with. REPULSIVE is what you are. How is it so hard for some people to not be hurtful to others? I can’t with most people. I just can’t. It baffles me knowing how much of society is when it comes to others. Like come one, some things you just don’t fucking do. 

Something about the sounds of a guitar & ukulele just bring up my mood no matter what. Saw my ukulele collecting dust and just cleaned it, tuned it, and tried to learn a song I forgot how to play and it reminded me how much I love music. Now that summer is coming up soon, more jam sessions are definitely going down even if I’m with people who don’t play or sing. I’ve made a huge step in being more courageous posting a random video of me singing to my extended family & friends who either forgot I loved to sing or never knew. I’m glad I did because it showed me I should never be afraid of what I love to do. The feedback I got was a shock too. Ever since I’ve  been posting more and more. Still need a lot to work on, especially the nerves. Little by little they’re going away. All I know is that I’m pretty damn happy! 

Someone asked me why I wasn’t looking for someone to be with and all this other mumbo jumbo thinking I’m sad that I don’t have someone to call my own. Let me just put this out there, you say that as if people are objects that you can just own and that’s where so many people go wrong in relationships. At least that’s how I see it. Oh and newsflash, I’m not the only one out of everyone I know who is single. Not to mention that I’ve seen more people who happen to be with someone to be miserable than those I know who are single. I don’t know what made it seem like I’m sad and shit because I’m far from that. The way I see it, one should not put way too much focus on having a significant other as if it’s a do or die situation. I’ve seen too many people have that mentality and that’s just unfortunate. Learn to be happy with yourself. Learn that you don’t always need to depend on someone to LOVE you to feel amazing, important, or that you’re the shit lol. And if you’re not happy with someone then just leave. 

People trying to act like they give a damn when they just like to snoop and shit. Do yourself a favor and worry about yourself instead of my life. 

Being discouraged from someone who is supposed to encourage you through your journey blows. But that’s okay, I’m doing this for me! I will conquer this journey. It won’t be easy and it’s going to take time but nothing worthy of gaining is easy. It’s not meant to be easy. If it was, we wouldn’t grow at all. 

When you feel like you were about to pass out and give up in the middle of a workout but you push yourself to finish it and do a little more than you thought you would be able to do. Yeah, that feeling is really good. We tend to surprise ourselves sometimes. Goes to show you should always put in the effort despite whatever is in your way. 

Feeling more motivated, even a bit proud. These lifestyle changes are going to become habits. It’s all a progress and as long as I keep at it, I will get to where I want to be and more. (: 

No one asked you to stay down for anyone. You stay down for others if that’s what you want. If that’s what you’re genuinely feeling. Don’t act like you were forced or anything. I’m not about that whatsoever. Keep doing you, I accept that. But I’m not down for people who are shady and all talk just to make themselves look good. All I ask is you don’t go astray when I need you the most, accept me & my ways, and just downright care for me. But I forgot that that’s asking for too much these days from people. Didn’t know it was that difficult of a thing to do for people. This is why I keep my circle really small. 

Best believe I’m not hesitant to cut people off. I don’t need to waste my energy around negative and fake people. You good bruh, sayonara.